The incident that sparked off this topic was nothing too special, just a moment's thought on what it would feel like, to die at this moment. What I felt then, leads to this post...
Life very often revolves around what we do, and what we wish to. To reach a steady state where the wishlist stands satiated for good, I guess is what we all aspire to do in life. I would IMAGINE, that crossing over at such a stage would hurt one the least.
My concerns were related mostly with one major facet of said wishlist; the one relating to the people in one's life. To think that it was time to go already, with SO much that I had to say still unsaid, was quite perturbing.
It led me to the thought of keeping a "Will", ready with ALL I had to say to the ALL the people who had mattered. It would be THE definitive repository for all my respective "last words".
If one were to question the purpose/need/significance of such an arrangement, well... I shall reply with...:
Our lives are a sum total of all that we see, experience, feel, hear et al. An infinitely large component thus, is our interaction with the myriads of people we meet during the journey; some that last for a moment, some for a lifetime; some that show you a lifetime in said moment, some that recur, some that do not, and so, so SO on.
So if we were to look at life as one big jigsaw puzzle, one can safely say that all the above mentioned are small pieces to be placed on the trans-cosmic game board, where life plays with us. So, at the risk of sounding a LITTLE presumptuous, I feel, that MY "last words" (or the not so last ones even for that matter!) could be a part of the puzzle for someone else, just as their contributions have been vital pieces in mine.
Of course, there IS the added incentive, of expressing oneself, and thus freeing the input/output buffer of the mind, thus enabling more ideas to flow through, abounding and unrestrained.
Ok... so returning to the plan of action...
Now JUST when I was starting to get pleased with the idea I'd devised, something struck me, that would change EVERYTHING.
I'm not the ONLY ONE whose going to die around me. To cut to the contextual chase, what if someone I had reserved a few words for, were to pack off to THE place while I was just starting to get my passport made...?! To put it in more blunt terms, WHAT IF, someone I REALLY cared for, and had SO much to say to, were to die before I did?
The entire skyscraper of my plan collapsed even before it got off the ED sheets. However, something REALLY freaky reared its head at the horizon then...
Nobody can predict the hour of our leaving. So why not "send" my "last words" (PRO-active) to the people, rather than "leave them behind" (RE-active). It would be a dynamically updating "report on ALL that has to be said", from me, to my people.
"Dynamic", because it takes little more than a moment for a life altering nuance in the bouquet of feelings to change. So IF such a plan WERE to be implemented, it had very well be implemented with the requisite rigor... तहज़ीब is THE word.
So in short, once the mad little cat ends its dance on my head, perhaps I should get down, and WRITE... write like there is no tomorrow, and quite literally at that...
As for the "incompleteness"... Well... its just that I'm not too convinced if there ever will be a state, where my wishlist shall INDEED be completely vanquished. Wishes are a funny thing, they have a habit of popping up JUST when you feel you're done with the entire lot.
Without doubt, the one who manages to reach the state of "no wishes left", would TRULY be at peace with the self, the world and the One. (Ich vertraue auf Dich)
Nonetheless, no matter WHAT the odds against one reaching the state, one can and SHOULD always try. That, I guess, would be in conformity with our dharma.
So many people I love... SO much to tell/write...
Sigh... So much love...
Kandisa!
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